Sunday, August 27, 2006


Hi G,
Great to hear that your new book is out. - I shall order a copy from your website.
Everything is well here and there is great enjoyment of the peace of knowing there is nothing 'I' ought to be doing to get and retain that peace.
- Looking back it seems as if there has always been the thought that there is something important to do and something important to find out and it will require great struggle.
- The dropping of that burden of ‘becoming’, releases an unspeakable sense of completion. - There is so much paradox in this whole thing.
- There is something important to be found out and that is the letting go of all struggle and knowing what is already present which is what one was after all along using effort and struggle as the means. - A laughable paradox.
On a Buddhist meditation retreat after a particularly suffering ridden group sitting with an intense migraine, panic feelings, struggle, etc. - the decision was made that it was all too awful, quite beyond me and that giving up the whole thing and going home was what had to be done or I would not survive the ordeal of the next few days.
- After that session and back in my room while slowly eating my tray of breakfast and in total despair there was suddenly a flooding of total relief, peace, bliss, no thought, no struggle, just the such-ness of the moment in all its glory.
- I should have put two and two together and instead of carrying on with more years of heavy practice, I should have had a jolly good laugh and cut and run!!!
I have had very short lived relapses into old conditioned patterns when exposed to spiritual teachings which emphasize a path of practice.
These immediately produce a heavy burdened feeling until dropped like a hot potato.
Eternally grateful that something loosened up here and fell out of the picture on contact with your website and the communications that followed, including your first book and CD.
Warmest regards as ever. - Vanessa